Love is hard

All So Cute on Etsy.com

I figured that I would take a moment to contemplate the old cliche here today. The truth of the statement "love is hard" is that we really, as humans, do not fully understand what this emotion "love" is. It cannot be scientifically broken down into elements, it cannot be extrapolated from the body, and it isn't the same for any two people on this planet. How are we, as individuals, as complex and complicated as we are, supposed to figure out ways to make love make sense in our lives when we don't even understand ourselves half the time (and love, as we know, involves others in the equation)?

Another scary thing about love is that can control our thoughts and feelings. It has the ability to change our lives in fundamental ways. When we find love, we will do anything to keep it. But sometimes we think it is love and it really is not, so we spend our precious time trying desperately for something that wasn't meant to be. Given my own history, I feel like we go through these experiences to learn something about ourselves, but sometimes I feel like it would have been nice if we could figure that thing out without such heartache and frustration. Is it all worth it in the end when we realize that we've really reached that pot-of-gold at the end of a rainbow of crazy past "practice" relationships?

Love exists not just between couples, but also between family and friends. Love has so many faces and so many challenges, it is hard to keep loving when the world is so distracting, and the movies and tabloids put misconceptions in our heads and lead us to distrust our own feelings. But after all of this, we still come back for more, we continue to pursue love, fall in love, and do crazy things out of and in spite of love.

And that is why love is hard.


And worth it--worth the fights, the sadness, the worrying, and the frustration--for the feeling you get when he or she is holding your hand through the hardest of times.

When he or she is helping you achieve your dreams.

When you realize that there is no one else you'd rather see every morning when you wake up.

When you get past the heartache and the honeymoon, and all you have left is happiness that is as indescribable as the idea of love in the first place.

Don't define it, it doesn't need logic, it just needs faith and trust. Here's to love feeling a bit easier today.

I'm wishing...

For an awesome wedding reception song list! I am in some serious need of dance tunes lately. Maybe I need to go to more Zumba classes and get my dance on to get it out of my system. I love really good dance tunes, but not all the "traditional" ones like "Celebration" or "Shout" (although some relatives may be a bit upset by that...) This has been on my mind since we've been setting up appointments with DJs for our wedding this week!  Now that most of our bigger contracts are taken care of, I am ready to focus on the details!

Really, this is in my blood people. Check out the proof:

My sophomore year of high school- Show Choir in Nashville

Action Shot- Company of Singers

My senior year of high school- Branson

Happy Birthday to my Love!

I want to wish Kyle a very happy 32nd birthday. Since 32 is my lucky number, it only makes sense that he is going to marry me this year, and make me the luckiest girl alive! For his birthday, we went out for 2 wonderful dinners, and one delicious brunch, visited 2 favorite bars, and watched our favorite football teams. But I think his favorite gift would have to be the couples' massage I scheduled for us! We both needed it!

Who wouldn't love this bearded hottie?! By the way the background is the Silverthorne Ice Castle.

I learned through our couple's massage experience that we will definitely need a session the week of our wedding, and I think I'll spring for the 2 hour massage for that one. I have come to love the power of a good massage over the past few months of wedding planning. In fact, I sprang for the monthly massage to get the preferred customer price (the nice thing is that if we don't use it one month, the cost we pay rolls over and then we can get a longer massage or add a facial the next month if we want.) Kyle also can use my account so we can treat each other as times get stressful closer to the big day.

So beyond being a birthday wish and gift, my point is that I recommend finding a good masseuse nearby and treating yourself without feeling bad about it for one minute! It is totally worth the extra time and cash to relieve the tension while planning for anything in life, or even when not planning anything at all.

Confession: Wedding Videos

I watch total strangers' wedding videos and cry my eyes out when no one else is looking. Hopefully, this exercise in self torture will purge me of all the tears I will try to avoid on my wedding day. I'm paying for that makeup, after all! I found this beaut just this week: Peak Impact Productions

To a tear-free weekend!!

www.mobiletoones.com

Knowing when it's right...

I may have led you astray in that title, because I am not here to talk about knowing when you are ready to marry the right man, as the famous cliche would allude. I am sharing with you the lesson this past 6 months of wedding planning have taught me, that I need to just go with my gut. I shared with you that I just knew that I needed to retry on my wedding dress (the one I chose) because I couldn't get it out of my head. Then I also shared how I subconsciously did not pay for the first officiant we found and liked because he seemed rather pricey.  Well, all has fallen into place as we wrapped up another week of wedding planning in Colorado last week. We hired our officiant, Josh, and spent a wonderful hour and half at our favorite local joint, the Dam Brewery, outlining what is set to be an amazing wedding ceremony that captures our humor and fun-loving personality as a couple, but incorporates the very real love we share and want to express to each other in front of our closest friends and family. We also got our contract with our caterer, who is by far the best deal we've scored so far in this wedding planning, and after the tasting we had (more to come), is not just a value but a talent! We got a videographer, a florist, and a rehearsal dinner lined up as well, and all because I stopped worrying about doing "the right" thing and started to go where my heart led me. After all, it is how I found Kyle, why couldn't it also apply to our wedding vendors?

Lake Dillon, CO as the sun rose our last day. It is the only time we've seen a glassy frozen lake, due to lack of snow.

2012 Preview

I am a list-maker. Since I was a young age, I have found it easier to be productive when I get to cross off each item as I complete it. Today, I make electronic lists by e-mailing myself with schedules, agendas, and reminders. I make lists in my planner (still old fashioned- not electronic) and make lists on post-it notes that I post in my planner. I make lists all over my desk at work, and make new lists each time the current list starts looking too messy. I will not apologize for my lists. So here is my current 2012 wedding planning list, otherwise known as a preview of what fabulous topics are to come over the next few months of this blog.

• Book caterer 
• Decide on cake decorations and flavors
• Book DJ
• Decide on Videographer
• Choose floral arrangements
•  Make reservations for rehearsal dinner
• Choose groom's and groomsmens' outfits
• Choose my wedding accessories, shoes, jewelry... 
• Choose first dance...
• Create Centerpieces
• Write wedding ceremony (portions)
• Order favors
• Lose that last inch so my dress zips up
• Accessorize the wedding!
• Continue Pinterest and Etsy inspiration (obsessions)
• Make invites
• Send invites
• Stay positive
• Enjoy every second of it, as it will be the only time I'll get to plan a wedding!

It may look like a lot, but the biggest decisions have already been made and the overall wedding is coming together splendidly already! I cannot wait. Happy 2012 everyone!

As the sun set on 2011, 2012 is set to be the best year of our lives thus far!

2011 Review

Of all the years of my life, each one seems to get progressively better. 2011 was an amazing year. I have so many wonderful people in my life, as shown by the tremendous support I've received for my wedding, my blog, and all of life's other activities. I cannot wait to see what 2012 will bring. Here are my top 11 memories of 2011 (in no particular order).

1. Our 2-week fall road trip through Colorado in October. Seeing the beautiful colors that covered the state instilled a sense of awe at Mother Nature and renewed (like it was ever gone) my love for the mountains and fall colors. I got to see Aspen and hike the Maroon Bells, go to Crested Butte for the first time and stay in my first hostel, and visit Palisade and the Colorado National Monument.

2. Experiencing the births of many of our friends' first children. It has been amazing to watch (from afar) the little ones grow and learn.

3. Camping trips with two great groups of people, my coworkers and our annual camping trip friends, and getting to tour Tonto Natural Bridge and enjoy all of Payson's natural beauty, namely tall trees and the Rim.

4. Getting 8 ski days in last winter, with the best snow Colorado had seen for years. I skied Winter Park, Copper, and Steamboat with family and friends.

5. Running in the City Search Challenge in Phoenix, a sort of "Amazing Race" for the locals. It was more work than I anticipated, but a memorable and fun experience. 

6. Getting to go to Chicago not once, but twice, for 2 conferences for work. Common Core left some things to be desired, but NCTE (National Council for Teachers of English) was well worth my time.

7. On that note, getting ENGAGED in Chicago on June 26/27 and feeling more loved than ever before while enjoying each minute of our engagement thus far.

8. Christmas with both families, 3 in 24 hours to be exact, and making it work out so that we could be with everyone and see their faces while they opened all the gifts. 

9. Wedding planning, when it was not too stressful, meeting our photographer and planner and getting excited about the final product (our wedding) with everyone's creative input.

10. Sedona, AZ engagement photo session, from climbing in the freezing cold Oak Creek to get that "perfect shot" to changing outside the Chapel on the Rock to get pictures in my favorite outfit before the sun set altogether.

11. Going to Tucson for Kyle's birthday in January and touring the Mission San Xavier, Colossal Cave, and horseback riding through the desert.

Of course, there were many more memorable nights with friends and family, too many to count, and I have realized how lucky we really are to have the life we have. Aside from the events mentioned, successfully reaching over 5000 views on my blog has made me feel even more blessed and has been more rewarding than I ever imagined. Continue on! See you in 2012.

Maroon Bells October 2011

Kyle lounging with Maroon Bells

Fall Color!

My first family bar outing (the youngest is finally 21) in Denver October 2011

"The Bean"- Chicago, IL

City Search Challenge Starting Line

Christmas #3 in Minnesota

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

9 Months!!

Holy cow! We've been engaged for over six months, and have only nine to go until our wedding day! We celebrate the occasion today with half of each family, flying from Minnesota to Colorado this evening. We just took a 2-hour walk in the unseasonably warm MN winter weather, and it was then that I realized the date. I am so excited!!! Cheers! [holding up my hot chocolate and Baileys mug]

At my Master's graduation from ASU (limited pictures since I'm not on my own computer!)

Wednesday Wish!

Although I truly just wish I had more vacation time to relax and hang out with the family (I shouldn't complain with 2 whole weeks for the holidays), I am also getting more and more checked off my wedding list so the wishes are narrowing to the details. The details are the fun part, anyway. Today's detail wish: cute shoes. When I got my dress last week, I was told that I had to know which shoes I thought I might be looking at wearing so that the dress doesn't wind up being too long or too short. I chose a medium heel height, but honestly I don't know what I'll wind up doing for shoes!! Here is one idea, which may hint at details from my dress... ;)

From Pinterest

Marry Christmas to All!

Pun intended.

Hope you and yours have a fabulous holiday. We are splitting this Christmas between 2 families in 2 states once again. Started Christmas Eve with the future father-in-law, moving into Christmas morning with the future mother-in-law, then onto a 4-hour plane ride for Christmas with my family in Minnesota. It may feel like a lot of work and stress right now, but it is all worth it to continue all the family traditions on both sides of the family while we still have the luxury of doing so.

Zoo Lights at the Phoenix Zoo- one of our many holiday traditions.

I bought a DRESS!!!

I know I've already blogged about dress shopping, and discussed the bridal salon experiences I've gone through, but even with all my talk, I did not officially purchase a dress until now!

I am absolutely ecstatic that I waited and that this can now be marked off my long list of wedding to-dos. I am glad I waited because I got to really think about my decision, and I don't doubt my choice at all now. I am also glad it is over, because the 4-6 month delivery period puts me a little bit uncomfortably close to the wedding date!

I am sad that I did not choose the dress from my favorite bridal shop, Uptown Bridal, in Chandler. I realized, however, that their fabulous customer service could not distract me from thinking that another dress I had previously tried on was worth a second glance. Turns out, the old adage that brides choose the first dress they try on may be closer to reality than I thought. The dress I bought was among the first 5 I tried on the first day I went shopping for my dress in Denver. I should have gone with my gut and taken care of it then, but having waited I scored a $600 discount and got to give my patronage to a Chandler business as well. I wound up purchasing my Casablanca gown at Yes I Do Bridal from a very nice couple, who also had great customer service. And after trying on the dress a second and third time, I keep loving it more and more.

So the benefits go either way. Buy early and stop worrying about finding a better dress "out there" because you're probably wearing your favorite one right now anyway. However, if you do shop around, you can also solidify your choice and not wonder "what if there is another dress out there I'll love more" and you could save yourself some cash!

If there is one thing I learned, it is that it is beneficial to ask around when pricing your dresses as well, as each shop can charge what they want, and some will be cheaper than others for the same dress!

Sorry, can't show the dress online!!! You'll have to wait to see!

Christmas Wishes!

My wishes today are not primarily wedding-themed, but holiday-themed. Who can escape the spirit of the season?!

Wish 1: For my students to come back after the break grateful for all they have been given and with renewed energy and desire to learn.

Wish 2: For me to do the same, except renewed energy to teach.

Wish 3: To see some snow over the holidays.

Wish 4: Relaxation, hot Irish coffee or chocolate, and Christmas cookies!

Wish 5: Time filled with laughter, memories, for both my families!

Wish 6: That everyone likes the gifts we got them!

Wish 7: For all you wonderful blog readers to have a safe and happy holiday!

Ok, I'll admit to having a teary moment...

I've been strong, held it together, and continued to insist that weddings (my wedding to be specific) are CELEBRATIONS not tear-fests. I've not cried at many weddings myself, although a good Hollywood movie wedding filled with pathos and irony can often get me, but in real life I find it hard to cry about something so darn good!

I had a teary moment.

One of the best moments of this engagement thus far, however. In fact, one of the best moments of my relationship, I'd venture to say!

I had been asking Kyle to write up a blurb about me for our wedding website (still a work in progress) as I wrote the "About the Groom" section and thought it would be fun if we told each other's stories. He, being busy and mathematically minded, was putting it off until I begged him to help me mark off items on my to-do list.

And then he wrote the most touching, funny, and true paragraph with words I thought only Hollywood could come up with.

And once again, wishes, fairy tales, and maybe even Hollywood movie weddings CAN come true! And DO!

Tear.

The most cheesy romantic cliche photo I could find... butterflies in my stomach! :)

Confession: All I Want for Christmas

I must confess, I am having a hard time enjoying Christmas when the much more-anticipated wedding is getting nearer and nearer each day. Every year, people look forward to the spirit of the holidays and the time with family, gift giving, and of course food. Well, I'll see you one Christmas and raise you one Wedding!!

Why weddings are more fun than Christmas (not that anyone out there will argue):
1. The cake. I love Christmas cookies as much as the next person, but cake wins, hands down.
2. DANCING. Christmas dancing is really reserved for New Year's Eve, not Christmas.
3. Dresses. It is much too cold in Minnesota to dress up on Christmas and be comfortable, so until I spend Christmas in Phoenix (which can also be freezing in December,) I give one more point to Weddings.
4. More friends and family. I don't know about you, but we are lucky that my immediate family can be together for Christmas. Weddings are filled with all the people you love, not just a select few.
5. Christmas may mean happiness and joy for a month or two, but my wedding will mean a lifetime of happiness and joy. (I know, I am so cheesy now that I'm a bride to be).

On that note, all I really wanted for Christmas this year was a wedding, and I am getting exactly what I want.

Christmas 2010 in Minnesota!

On the 12th of December...

On the 12th of December, my true love gave to me, presents that needed wrapping.

A sign of times to come I am sure, but I am not complaining, as one of the few tasks I enjoy "taking over" as the wife is wrapping gifts for holidays. I know I will go all out and make them fancy, with bows, and add gift tags instead of writing the recipients' names in Sharpie on them. My perfectionist side likes this task.

One thing I've noticed about wedding planning in the midst of the holiday frenzy is that it is really hard to think of gifts you want that you don't want to register for in a few months.

Why don't they have "Christmas Registry"?? I mean, how much easier would our holiday shopping be if we could all just go shopping, use a pricing gun to scan a bunch of stuff we like, and then send that list out to all our friends and family? In our family at least, we kind of already do this with the hopes that the items on our wish lists will be easy to find. It might take some of the excitement out of unwrapping a present, but at least there is no need to wait in the return lines the week after Christmas.

I do wish that I did not have to try to balance my time between work (the end of the semester), Christmas (13 days and counting down), and wedding planning (only 9 months left?!?!). Unfortunately, work usually takes precedence, but this year I've slacked a bit, causing even more "end of the semester" stress. Slacking is maybe too harsh a word because I have successfully bought gifts, wrapped gifts, set up appointments over Christmas break with our wedding vendors, and even decorated the house! That is a lot to accomplish with all the other stuff going on during this time of year. I just need to quit procrastinating doing the real work I have so I can enjoy the holidays, stress-free.

So as the holidays near, I hope that I can keep up with my blog posting so I can be an avenue for all of you to procrastinate, too! :) Or you can spend your time browsing Pinterest for winter wedding themes, like me.

Via Pinterest